Well howdy-doo, true believers. Name's Wade Wilson, AKA Deadpool. If you've got a grudge, I'm the guy to talk to. But enough about you. Let's talk about me! When I had cancer, I went to the Canadian Weapon X program to get it fixed. They did, it's just that they also messed up my skin, and made me completely bonkers too. So now I run around as a mercenary. You don't know what that is? Then why the hell are you here? Fine. Mercenary just means "gun-for-hire". Happy? Anyway, I've met my fair share of people on my jobs. Agent X, Xcept he was cooler before he was morbidly obese, Weasel, who's a little too possessive of the Cheeto puffs, Blind Al, crafty old bat, Domino, the X-Men didn't really like me, Kalani, who kind of hated me, but Outlaw? Diggity-dang! That bod could make bacon sizzle. And that would be some righteously delicious bacon.

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